I read this article and I was immediately struck by a sense of familiarity. Not of the content of the article, but of its structure. I was shocked that it hadn’t occurred to me how many articles follow a very well-defined structure. They can almost be automated.

Here is my analysis of that structure. You can use this to write your own New York Magazine (or other newspaper’s) article!

A brief but Catchy Name Identifying the Subject

A short phrase describing the subject’s uniqueness — preferably with a conjunctive clause that creates a stark contrast with the former — and the impact he’s had on others. And now the twist.

Start a story with a date and a seemingly unrelated person and a few adjectives that help the reader visualize the situation. Mention something pedestrian. And now the sudden suspense moment.

Introduce the second person, ideally speaking something.

A confusing moment ensues, but is quickly explained away. And now the story is weaved in with the headliner.

Introduce the author of the article as a participant, in passing, as we quote somebody. And have them use extreme superlatives to describe the subject.

Start psychoanalyzing the subject, contrasting the good with the bad. Rephrase the twist from the first paragraph.

Back to the story, to make sure that the reader noted that the author actually spent some effort writing the story, ideally went on a journey. Introduce another person to make the story more convincing.

Describe the subject’s physique and some personality traits, again, ideally ones that imply that the author spoke to him. Ask a rhetorical question perhaps?

Finish the initial story so the readers aren’t left in suspension. Use a swearword, of course in a quote.

[Include a picture of the subject that mirrors the description, taken in a setting that seems to confirm every detail presented so far]

…continue for four more pages, pretty much switching between primary story, secondary story, anecdotes, psychoanalysis (ensure both sides are represented — the audience should, however, feel somewhat in awe about the subject — after all, a major magazine like that would not have written about a nobody!)…

End with a terse dialogue, with a witty ending by the subject. Then say something predictive, something positive (but not without a hint of uncertainty).

This entry was posted on Saturday, July 24th, 2010 at 15:14 and is filed under The Daily Badness, art, for reflection, reductions. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.